Espoir
by Vectress
Summary: But the most fragile thing a human heart can possess is hope.
1. Chapter 1

**Once you choose hope, anything's possible.**

_Christopher Reeve_

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**CHAPTER ONE**

Do you believe in supernatural stuff? Like ghosts or something? Immortal beings that lurk around, ferrying people to hell? Well, I didn't... At first. I don't know about you, but they're true. Maybe you're thinking I'm a schizophrenic and I'm having delusions or whatever. But you can back out right now from reading this if you don't believe me. For those who wish to continue, go on. Read.

So let's start with the basics, shall we? My name is Isabel, Isa for short. I'm fifteen years young, a third year high school student. I live in the sunny Philippines, and what I mean by sunny is that it can literally burn your skin and consume all your body fluids. School's only ended this month, and I'm off to another country to save my skin (and my water reservoir in my body) and have my summer vacation. By another country, I mean Japan. I was planning on Europe, but unfortunately, my dad won't let me, despite the fact that his main business was there. *Pout*

Okay, my dad. Let's not divulge much about him, I want to keep him in low-profile. All I would tell about him is that he's a businessman and a darn _rich_ businessman at that. He managed to buy a traditional Japanese mansion for a vacation house. Yes, a vacation house which would well pass to be the sister of the palace of the Imperial family. That's where I'm staying right now. Not going to Europe doesn't feel so much bad right now when my dad makes me feel a princess of Japan.

Moving on, even if my dad really did intend to make me his little princess, we're not that close. Heck, we _are_ not close. Screw the father-daughter relationship when you see us. Why, you might ask. A lot of reasons, really. So many I've lost count. On top of all reasons, landing on the number one spot, was the fact that he's always away. Being a businessman, he does a lot of business trips. Not just in the Philippines but all over the world. He didn't really see me grow up. But he sent me things like wardrobe-full of clothes, shoes, or the latest gadgets. My selfish side loves him. And that's all the side he can squeeze love from.

It's a good thing he's always away. Second reason: I _loathe_ him. Okay, that might be an exaggeration, but you get the point. Before I tell the whole story, let me introduce my mother first. My mother's name is Isabella. I was obviously named after her. She's the most wonderful woman in the world. When my father's gone, which is always, she would be the one there for me. We would laugh in our garden and she would braid my hair and she would tell me about all the flowers she planted. My life was great, even without a father in the picture. But the thing is: she's dead. She died when I was seven because of breast cancer, and my jerk father came home one year after her death, visited her grave for ten seconds and flew off to another land I didn't care to know. That's when he started sending me stuff. I didn't know why he did, maybe to console me or something, but it didn't work. He's still the lousiest father in the face of the earth.

My mother and father, well, their marriage was fixed. My mother was forced to marry him to save their family's business and reputation. I admire her for doing that, because she sacrificed her life's happiness (for a stupid man). She was a budding pianist, but gave up her dream when she married. I never dared to ask how her life was on those first few years, how she coped up with a husband who did not love her. I can see much in her song compositions, how, when I tried to play them, I would never reach halfway because it's so sad it broke my heart.

I often wondered how I came to be born into this world. Maybe it was just the love of my mother for my father, which she had learned to develop on the first few years of their marriage that it didn't matter if she was being taken for granted. Her love was never returned, and I hate my dad for not trying. My mom is not hard to love and with me around, that would've been easy (at least in movies). But I guess my dad wasn't at all the man-in-the-movies kind of guy. He only cared for his business and his wealth.

Another thing why I hate him is that I have his damn eyes. I'm a perfect carbon copy of my mom, but I inherited his eyes. Every time I look in the mirror, I see _him_. Well, not literally, because that would totally be creepy, but you get it.

Many people, usually my father's colleagues or business associates, would tell me my father do love me, that he works hard for my benefit and blah, blah, blah. I would look them in the eyes, try to understand them, and roll my eyes after they had gone. Pffft. Love, they say? I wonder if that man ever loved anybody but himself.

Let's carry on, because I might say more bad stuff about him.

I've been here for less than three weeks and I'm enjoying my stay. Miss Lu, who was attending to me every day, often took me outside the vacation house and would accompany me to the gardens, where she would tell me about the house, the flowers, and bits of Japanese history. She's the head keeper of the house, and she's nice, even though she looked austere in her black uniform. The maids would get out of her way when she passed, and she would wink at me, then I would smile.

One afternoon, I purposely sneaked out of the house without Miss Lu's permission. I was still bringing with me my attention-grabber headphones, which I again purposely wore that day just to annoy her. We have grown quite close, and since I already know her good side, I'm trying to see her bad side.

I came back at dinnertime, with my sneakers full of mud, and my clothes full off twigs and leaves. Miss Lu was on the verge of hysteria, and I bit back a laugh when I saw her reaction when she saw me. She was halfway her scolding when she abruptly stopped, closed her mouth and stood aside. I turned to my back and saw my dad, standing tall in his black suit. He looked down at me, his face expressionless, then asked:

"What happened to you?"

I looked at him, put my dirty hands at my back and shifted my weight to my other leg.

"Roaming outside," I said shortly. _And trying to annoy Miss Lu_, I thought.

He looked like he wanted to say more, but he did not. He only said that we will have dinner together in the ridiculously huge dining hall after I had washed up. Miss Lu accompanied me to my room, but if she was still mad at me, she did not show. We walked silently to my room, waited patiently for me to take a bath and delivered me back to my father. But before she finally went to attend to her other duties, she looked at me one last time, which clearly said, "I'll get to you later. Be prepared." It also said something like, "Thank your father for saving you."

But _nooooo_. My father is far from being my savior. Eating with him is worse than being scolded by Miss Lu. Thank God the dining hall is huge, and with it is a long dining table. My father was at the far end of the table and I'm on the other end. It would be impossible for us to have a conversation without yelling at each other. And, for other safety measures, I brought my headphones and my iPod with me. After the servant laid down my appetizer, I wore my shocking pink headphones, turned my iPod on maximum volume and started eating. I saw my dad look at me and I flashed him a sweet smile before I started eating (I can't even hear the clink of the utensils). That was disrespectful and Miss Lu would've strangled me to death if she was here. But hey, I'm a rebellious kid.

After the incident with my father at dinner, we never ate again together and I never saw him since then. After a week, still no face of him. But then, I don't really care. That day, it was raining outside and it was impossible to sneak from Miss Lu (she has grown extra cautious with me this time). Before she left me alone, she flashed her scary, sinister smile. Now I understand why the maids were scared of her.

So, with no choice left, I decided to hang out in the library, which was a bad decision because the library was filled with thick books that looked very heavy I'm afraid it would topple over me and crush my ribs. But it was better than wandering around the big house, so I got stuck with Mr. Library.

The library was spacious, it's every corner filled with shelves of books. I was running my finger through the shelves when I spotted a book. Well, duh, it's a library, it's normal for me to spot a book, but the book I found was out of place, and it was ingeniously kept because it was inconspicuous if you looked at the shelf as a whole. It was not thick, for one thing, and it was small, unlike its company of books. And it was jammed between two big, black books, which looked like a whole volume of Britannica (except that I can't read its title). And, when I forcefully pulled it out, the book was the only book with Japanese characters without a translation but surprisingly, it was written in English.

What would bored people normally do when they see a book? Well, of course, they would read it. So you know what came next. I read the book. The book was about a girl named Enma Ai. The author believed her to be the Hell Girl, the one who guarded the Gates of Hell and ferried people there. He narrated a story about seeing her past and whatever. He also mentioned about the Hotline to Hell, a website that can only be accessed at exactly 12 midnight. The author, who I discovered to be named Shibata Hajime, said that when you have a grudge on someone, you could visit her through her website, type the name of the person you hate, and then she will take it from there. You could avenge yourself and send someone straight to hell. The only thing is that you would also go to hell when you die.

I found the book bizarre but I still finished reading it, mainly because it was not such a boring story and it was not really thick. At the end of the book, there was a hand-drawn picture of a beautiful girl, long hair, wearing a kimono with a straight face. It was disturbing, because in the Philippine folklore, you should really be afraid of beautiful women.

Anyway, as it was nearing twilight, I started to look for Miss Lu, because Mr. Library was starting to scare me. I brought the book so that I can show it to Miss Lu then maybe she could tell me things about the mysterious girl (who doesn't seem to be mysterious anymore because I just read about her) in the book.

It wasn't that hard to find her, because I figured that she was looking for me too. She notified me about my schedule for next week, where we would go and all that. She said my dad fixed it for me. And I was impressed, because I would mostly go to history parks, museums, shrines and temples and such and I liked the idea.

"Hey Miss Lu, do you know about Enma Ai?" We already started walking. She led me to the dining hall to eat my dinner.

"She's an old myth, Isabel," she replied.

"But the book says she's real."

"What book?" she asked then turned to me.

"This book." I held up the gray book, which I forgot to mention that it was not tattered, and I assumed that it was not old.

I hardly heard her mutter, but I still made out that she said _"Jigoku Shoujo." _

"Can you translate it for me?" I asked, pointing to the Japanese characters on the cover.

"Hell Girl," she said. "You should believe that the Japanese have great imaginations, Isabel."

She walked again then said no more. I wanted to protest, to tell her that Filipinos are creative too, but thought better of it, so I kept silent and followed her.

* * *

That night, I can't go to sleep. I think it was because I mostly thought about Enma Ai. I would look at the book, fan its pages, and then glance at my laptop to see the time. It was already 11:59pm, almost 12 midnight. I started typing the URL of Hotline to Hell. I tapped my fingers on the desk, and my heart skipped a beat when the digital clock of my laptop turned 12:00am. I pressed enter. The site was all black and a small flame blazed. I did not understand what it said because it was in Japanese characters, and there was no translation, but I guessed it was an introduction or something. But I can see the box where the name of the tormentor was supposed to be typed and the very tempting button below it that must mean 'Enter' or 'Submit' or whatever.

I stared at it for a minute and the page expired. I looked at the clock and saw that it was already 12:01am. I can hardly believe it was real. I was thinking it was some kind of prank to scare people. But I'm not sure if pranks can make you visit it every 12 midnight.

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**Author's Note:**

The title means _'hope.'_ Just to make a difference, I translated it in French. If you're asking how it's pronounced, I have no idea. Sorry if the personal stuff about Isabel bored you. :-)

Reviews are highly appreciated, and you will be loved. :-)

_Vectress_


	2. Chapter 2

**Most of the important things in the world have been accomplished by people who have kept on trying when there seemed to be no hope at all.**

_Dale Carnegie_

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**CHAPTER TWO**

It's been one week since I've been accessing Hotline to Hell every midnight, and this is the same week I'm supposed to go touring Japan.

I don't know if my father was generous or if he's taking his revenge for my rebellious act some weeks ago because he loaded me with so much activities today that I was obliged to wake up early just so I could accomplish all of them that same day. But I didn't care much. I was too excited to do all of them.

My dog, Violet, which I forgot to mention earlier, came with us so she can have a walk. That morning, we went mostly to shrines and temples and Miss Lu, which I believed to be a tour guide before she went to work for my father, said everything she knew about the shrines and temples. Then we took a look at an enormous Buddha statue, admired the Sakura trees and walked to an ice cream parlor for a little break. I asked Miss Lu if I could walk alone outside the parlor when I finished my ice cream and she agreed. She also advised that I take Violet with me, and I obliged.

While walking, Violet suddenly got hyperactive and ran excitedly. I lost grasp of her and I desperately strained my ears to hear the bell on her collar. There were not a lot of people, but she was a fast runner, and in no time, she was out of my sight. I wanted to cry, to go back to Miss Lu and tell her I lost Violet, but I heard her bark, like she was urging me to follow her. I followed her bark, which, thankfully, she did every few seconds, to remind me that she was still there and not completely lost.

When I heard her bark the loudest, I was standing in front of an alley. There were several busy people in it, fixing their unkempt shops or sweeping the floor outside their small homes. The odd thing was that there were no people surrounding me. It was like I've traveled too far, and I can't see the ice cream parlor either. I was not a bit worried about me getting lost, because my dad has just about the greatest trackers in the world. I'm still her daughter, he would look for me. Or if not, then Miss Lu. Whoever. But my dog… They wouldn't bother looking for her if it wasn't for me. So I walked on, trying to hear Violet's barks. Then I saw her, running towards me like she's the happiest dog in the world.

"Bad dog, Violet!" But she didn't mind my scolding. She only nuzzled my ankle and barked affectionately. I scooped her up and turned to go back to the ice cream parlor. But the wall behind me already solidified.

"Uh-oh. This is not good," I muttered. I fished my cell out of my pocket but saw it was dead. How am I supposed to get out of here now?

I approached one of the ladies sweeping nearby.

"Uhm, excuse me, do you know how I can get out of this alley?" I asked politely, not even sure if she understood English.

She turned to me, her eyes flaring, then bellowed in Japanese which sounded like a long line of curse to me. I backed off, afraid that her head might blaze like a fire, because her eyes, with flaring flames really shocked the daylights out of me. I wanted to scream, but every time I tried, it felt like it was muted, just like how you mute a television.

"You crossed my territory," said a soft voice behind me.

"WOAH SHIT!" Then I stumbled butt first on the rock floor. My heart was attempting to jump out of my chest and it was pounding on my ears that I can't hear a thing. My heartbeat returned to its normal pace after a few seconds then I looked up to the girl who spoke.

She looked familiar, but I can't remember where I saw her. "Are you from here?"

"Yes. I am Enma Ai," she replied in a gentle voice, almost soothing. But her name sent a chill down my spine. I can't speak for a moment, but Violet barked happily, like they were good old friends. Enma Ai tossed a dog biscuit and Violet caught it then barked like she was asking for more biscuits.

I looked at Violet. "Hey, hey, you know her?"

"And you," I turned to Enma Ai, "You're real?"

"Yes," Enma Ai replied, and Violet barked simultaneously as if she was answering my question. I stared at the girl in front of me for a while, then asked, "Uhm, by any chance, do you know how to get me out of here? My attendant would be looking for me," I checked my watch. "Right about now."

"In this place, time is not in essence," she replied. I didn't understand her and I glanced at my watch anxiously one more time, then with shock, I realized what she was talking about. My watch was not working anymore. It stopped, broke, froze, I don't know what happened.

I looked at her incredulously, demanding for an explanation, but she was already walking, and since I was in a dead end, which was not how it was supposed to be, I followed her with Violet in my arms.

"Aren't you Hell Girl? The guardian of the Gates of Hell?" I asked.

"I am called that," she replied.

"Uhm…" I looked around me. "And this is Hell?"

"Only a part of it."

"Who are those people? They seriously freak me out." I shuddered, remembering the incident earlier.

"People who never found peace," she answered.

Okay, that is so not helping. I want to get out of here. Fast. But then, my companion here does not consider time is gold. And, add to that fact is my friendly dog in my arms started barking happily, like this walk is some kind of sight-seeing to her. The little traitor.

One second, I was walking between bricks, the next second; I was under a tree, with flowers, grass, and a flowing river that only seemed to be the life of the place. It was also the only thing that looked polluted. Its black waters flowed slowly, stretching to somewhere that I can't see I think it will flow forever and will go to nowhere. And then it was sunset. Holy shit, it was sunset!

Enma Ai was walking downhill and I followed her. She said time is not essential in this place but it was already sunset! Before I went into this mess it was 3:00 in the afternoon and then here, it's almost dark. I tried to relax, to remember that it was normal, because according to the book I read about Enma Ai her place was frozen in time, frozen in eternal twilight. Since I have confirmed that Enma Ai was real, I guess I can believe the other things he has mentioned in the book. I was so busy relaxing myself I bumped right into her.

"Oh, sorry," I muttered.

"You have been visiting me," she said softly. "Why?"

"You know?" I asked, surprised. "Of course you know, you just asked me. Psh."

Silence.

"Well, I think maybe because I wanted to ferry someone to hell," I said, matter-of-factly. And even I was surprised by my truthfulness.

"You could have done that." Her back was still on me. "But you didn't."

"Yeah, well…"

"Because of greed," she finished.

She got it right. Remember what I said that the selfish side of me loves my father? I thought that when he dies, who would sustain my needs? The board of officials would take over all of his business, forget that he has a lone daughter, and I would go poor. Then what? I don't know what'll happen to me. But how can she possibly know? I thought better than to ask.

"Many people went to hell and will still go because of greed," she whispered. It was like she was rubbing in on me my fatal flaw. I get it. My ego will be further wounded if she keeps on doing that.

At the distance, I could see clouds forming. I'm not sure if they were clouds, mist or fog, but they started to make up blurred images, then they started to clear, to have defined images. It was all different. But mostly, they were fiery images, with souls wailing and crying. Others looked like a place where snow was abundant and it looked like it would not stop any sooner. Still, others looked like long roads, never ending roads. The images were so many I couldn't look at all of them at once. But one thing was common among those pictures. There was suffering.

"That is hell? I thought hell was supposed to be fiery and hot and, you know, things like that," I said, but my eyes were still glued to the moving images in front of me.

"Hell is only what you perceive it to be," she said wistfully.

"But the Bible stated it that way," I said but she did not respond. I got the feeling she really isn't into religion.

"The hell you know was planted to so many minds it appeared that way when they died."

"But still others made up their own hell." I noticed. "What if I thought of hell as a happy place, with God in it?"

"Then that's not hell at all," she said.

"But why? I thought hell is only the perception of someone."

"There's a difference."

"What's the difference?"

Enma Ai started walking again, and the mist dissipated. This time, we walked near the river, which didn't look like a river at all. Instead of water, the river was filled with things. Broken things. Before I could ask, Enma Ai spoke.

"The river is named the River of Dreams," she paused. "The only problem is: they are broken dreams, Isabel."

I looked at her. I'm out of words to say. I can't find the right words to ask her something. I just hope she would understand me and continue to speak.

"The heart is like Pandora's box, Isabel," she continued. "It's full of different things: wicked things, virtuous things, love," she paused. "But the most fragile thing a human heart can possess is hope. And once it's freed from the heart like all the other things a man can give, all is broken – his life, his dreams and his soul. That's why they end up here with me."

"But what about the people you ferry to hell?" I asked.

"That's a different story, but all the same. They are all hopeless."

"I don't understand," I said truthfully.

"They give up hope that they can change themselves, that they can become better people. Those who seek my help are the same. They give up hope that there is something better for them and get blinded by revenge."

"Why are you telling me all these? I was only asking for your help because I wanted to get out of here."

"Your mother, she also visited me like you did. Back then, when she was alive," she said. I was shocked. My mother?

"I suppose both of you wanted to ferry to hell the same man," she continued.

"How? What – ?" I stammered. She must have figured out my mind was confused, puzzled, bewildered and any synonymous word to that.

"Once in a while, my companion, Ren, would take interest in mortals who visited Hotline to Hell but never really type any name," she started. I heard the name. Yeah, must be the book. "And one of those mortals was your mother."

I looked at her expectantly. She glanced at me then continued to narrate while she stared in the horizon. "He investigated, and knew of your mother's pain."

I know much of that part, and I don't need to be told. Enma Ai must have felt it and there was a moment of silence.

"She didn't give up hope, you know," she said at last.

She looked at me with an I-know-you-will-not-give-up-hope expression. Her face told me that much.

"And Ren was there when your father visited her grave," she added.

I stared at her. I wanted her to say something, anything that might give me a good reason to love my dad. Nothing. I heard nothing. She just walked around me and hit me at the back of my head.

"What was that for?" I asked angrily.

"You should know by now why he's sending you things. Or why he let you have a vacation out of your country. If you don't figure it out, you're a complete idiot. Your father still has hope in his heart, you know."

I turned to look at her, but she began dissolving, turning into a mist that would disappear any moment. But before she finally faded away, I saw her mouth the words "You know what to do." I guess I was supposed to _hear _it, but she was already vanishing.

I checked my watch. The second hand was already moving, but the time was still the same before I followed Violet into the alley. My cell was also fully charged right now, and I was beginning to type a text message to Miss Lu explaining why I had gone out so long when I realized I was just in front of the ice cream parlor and Miss Lu was looking at me, eating her ice cream just like how I'd left her earlier. I walked inside and she looked at me, puzzled.

"Why'd you go inside? I thought you'll walk with Violet for a while?" she asked.

I was stunned. So Enma Ai was really honest with the time thing.

"Uh…" I thought for an excuse. "Hey Miss Lu, do you know the schedule of my dad?"

She looked at me skeptically, but then brought out her organizer to check. She began saying different times and places where my dad would be and I listened intently, hoping to find a vacant time for him to take a break or something.

Then I thought of Enma Ai. Yes, I know what to do.

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**Author's Note:**

I hope you enjoyed my two-chapter fic! I'll leave it up to you what Isabel will do, but it's kind of obvious. When Hell Girl is supposed to be tragic, I'll make it something hopeful. Just to break tradition, you know. ;-)

Reviews are highly appreciated. :-)

_Vectress_


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